auction - bid now

At little harbor technology's request, we've made a donation to the Pen Bay Chamber of Commerce's annual auction. Buzzie Bee was a chamber member a few years ago and now maintains an affiliation with the chamber through our membership in CamRock Network. What's great about the auction this year? It's in person and online! If you or someone you know is looking for a great gift for new or expectant parents, check this out: one month of diaper service!

frozen diapers

Today's diaper pick ups included the season's first frozen diapers. The last two winters this was a much celebrated event because (1) frozen diapers don't smell nearly as much as their room temperature counterparts and (2) we delivered using a PT Cruiser.This summer we traded the PT Cruiser for a Toyota Tacoma pick-up so smell isn't really as much of a factor anymore. Live and learn!

gently used training pants for sale

I have 5 pairs of small Bummis Training Pants (for babies 20-30 lbs)that I'm looking to sell. A Buzzie Bee customer tested them with her twins so they've been used just a few times. The set of 5 would retail for $60 new, so I'm asking $30 used, enough to cover my cost to replace them. Please call or email if you're interested. We also have lots and lots of gently used prefolds and Bummis covers which we'd be happy to pass along.

Adios Panales!

Haydee is out of diapers. Done. Gone. ¡Adios pañales! Yippee! I hesitate to say that she is ‘potty trained’ because in all honesty took very little training. No sugary treats, no promises of a new toy, no real tangible reward other than dry, big girl panties. Definitely many moments of happy singing and dancing, getting puffed up proud, and of course the occasional explanation that, yup, that’s okay, accidents happen.

Each child reaches milestones in her own time and fashion. With our first daughter, who strives to please and maintain order, we packed up her diapers one day shortly after she turned two and never looked back. Being the parent of two children complicates matters in that what worked for one may not work for the other. With Haydee, who’s fiercely independent and wildly messy, I imagined it might take longer to be diaper-free. I thought we’d offer now but if she didn’t take to the potty, we’d just try again later.

Much to my surprise, Haydee wanted to be out of diapers. She’d use the toilet and want us all to know. During the her first diaper-free day, she created her own ritual for positive reinforcement. She wanted Daddy to sing to her. If he wasn’t home, she’d call him with a request, “Daddy, me go pee, you sing ABC Daddy, right now!” Lucky for us all, Daddy was more than happy to oblige.

Staying dry overnight has taken more effort. Haydee sleeps nearly 12 hours at night - a long time to a two year old bladder. We saw three options: put her in a diaper overnight, change wet sheets all the time, or get her up at least once during the night to use the toilet. We tried them all. She wore a diaper overnight for a few nights but then reminded us (with a full blown tantrum) that she was in fact finished with diapers. Over the last two weeks we’ve tired of changing and washing sheets, so we’re intentionally creating a habit of, at least once each night, sitting her on the toilet while she’s sleeping. So far so good. This morning she woke us at 4 AM screaming that she needed to pee. By the time I stumbled out of bed, found my glasses, her bed was wet but at least she knew what she needed to do. That’s progress. It takes three to four weeks to create a habit. I’m confident if we spend the next few weeks sitting her on the toilet before we go to bed, she’ll soon learn to wake herself up to go.

Back in the 1950’s, 95% of American children were out of diapers by the time they turned three. Today, only about half of American children are toilet trained by age three. In the 50’s, nearly all babies were in cloth diapers. Babies in cloth are more aware of their bodily functions as the cloth allows them to feel the sensation of being wet. Not that cloth diapered babies are toddling around sopping wet - because they’re not. But they do feel the wet sensation long enough to connect the feeling to what their body just did. Because of this, around the time that they begin to assert their independence in dressing and feeding themselves, they are typically ready to toilet independently as well. By choosing cloth, parents and children are less likely to encounter the power struggles involved in truly toilet training a three-, four- or even five-year old. There are many reasons to cloth diaper, but for me, as a parent who has a lot on her plate, this is the most compelling reason - easier and earlier toileting means less time in diapers! Less time in diapers means more time for something else.

Know of anyone looking for some gently used cloth diapers? Have them give me a call as Haydee’s diapers are good to go.

cloth makes a comeback

Last week I was talking to an advertising representative at a downtown Bath networking event. He was there promoting a magazine focused on coastal living. My husband and I were there promoting our businesses. We made a connection in that he’d cloth diapered his children, years and years ago. He was saying that what was once old is now new again. Whenever I go to networking events, I tend to bring along my baby - not my daughters - but the cabbage patch doll that my grandmother stood in line for decades ago. It’s helpful to have a “model” when talking about or demonstrating how to use cloth diapers. The ad rep immediately noticed how much cloth diapers had changed in the last twenty years. He commented that what’s old is new again only better. He got it right: cloth diapering is indeed making a comeback. And here’s why:

Cloth diapering is easy. Baby boomers are surprised to learn two basic facts about modern cloth diapers. Number 1: no pins! Number 2: no toilet dunking! Generations X and Y are delighted by how easy cloth diapering is now. Baby Boomers can’t believe the someone hasn’t thought of it when they were diapering their children. Today’s diapers secure with snaps or Aplix and can be easily washed in a standard washing machine or with a diaper service. Aplix is a type of velcro and usually diapers using this will have laundry tabs to secure so that the velcro stays free of gunk and doesn’t catch on anything else.

More and more information is available, locally and online. The March/April issue of Mothering magazine carries the headline Cloth Diaper Comeback and can be found at the Good Tern. The Real Diaper Association, a national cloth diapering advocacy group, provides internet searchers with facts and directs interested folk to local resources. Four times a year, Mid Coast Hospital offers a free Diapering 101 class. In Maine, there are two diaper services and at least a dozen stores selling quality cloth diapers. Local cloth businesses are more than happy to give demonstrations - often at no cost to you.

Increased awareness of environmental benefits of cloth. More and more transfer stations are introducing pay-by-the-bag. The cost of petroleum products (such as disposable diapers) is rising. Modern cloth diapers can be used, reused and then used some more. Energy efficient washers make it possible to launder cloth diapers with less water and without harsh chemicals. By laundering cloth diapers, waste stays out of the landfill - or wherever your municipality ultimately puts of trash. Cloth diaper manufactures are aware of and open with the sources of the fabrics used in making cloth diapers. Read the ingredient label on the disposable diaper packages... oh, yeah, there isn’t one. Hmm...

Increased awareness of health benefits of cloth. In a time where we are bombarded with chemicals and additives, cloth diapers are a natural haven. Unlike their throwaway counterparts, cloth diapers are pollutant free and contain no dioxin or Tributyl-tin. Dioxin is a cancer-linked chemical while Tributyl-tin is linked to hormonal problems in humans and animals. Back in the 50’s, when nearly every baby was in cloth, most babies potty trained at 18 months old. In the 80’s, when half the babies were in cloth, only 50% of babies were potty trained at 18 months. Now, with over 90% of babies in disposable diapers, two-thirds are still in diapers after their third birthday. Delayed potty training has taken its toll on the environment as well on the child. First there’s the prolonged exposure to chemicals. Second there is the impact on self-esteem in being too old for diapers but still in them.

Availability and options. Cloth diapering parents refer to their collection of diapers as their stash. No two stashes are identical. Selecting diapers is no different than shopping for a car or deciding what you want to be when you grow up. Admittedly, it can be overwhelming and is sometimes sited as reason for inaction. You can try a variety and make up your own mind. You can ask friends and family what worked for them and make up your own mind. If one diaper seems to work better than another, you can switch. You’re not locked in. Anyone who’s looking to try cloth diapers, please give me a call, I’d be happy to show you my stash!

motherhood, adoption and Guatemala

I wrote the following a few weeks ago. I'd heard that Guatemalan adoptions were to be the subject of a Dateline show and wanted to be share some of our story.

On being a waiting parent...

Haydee has been home just about a year and a half now. Doubling the number of children more than doubled the amount of time, energy and patience I need to make it through each day. Broo and I always knew we’d grow our family through adoption. We discussed it long before we were actually ready to be parents. In September 2005, we learned we’d been waiting for Haydee. Six months passed from the time we first met with the adoption agency to the day we were matched with Haydee. We’d done all the required steps - from an evaluation by a licensed social worker, comprised of three visits to our home and interviews of our friends, to mailing over 50 certified documents to three different government agencies. We were fingerprinted by Immigration and had current passports so we could travel at a moment’s notice. Doctors verified that we were fit to parent and we sent pictures of the local Catholic church to the Guatemalan government agency charged with making the final decision on our adoption. Hoop after hoop - we jumped through it. Every step of the way we met people whose lives are touched by adoption.

We first felt the warmth of the adoption community at an adoption education class required by our adoption agency. Here we found a forum to share how it feels to be “waiting parents”. I tried to liken it to how I felt as an “expectant parent” before Liefe was born but couldn’t. Being pregnant, on a good day, I felt invaded and huge. Even after a series of ultrasounds, I had trouble connecting with the baby inside. The disconnect vanished the first time I held Liefe. With Haydee, from the very start, I felt the connection and the distance. It troubled me to know that somewhere out there was a child waiting. And I wondered who, if anyone, was holding her, talking to her, kissing her good night, telling her how much she was loved. This past summer we attended a mini-reunion with the group to celebrate the fact that each family was finally complete, with four long-awaited children - from Guatemala to Kazakhstan - now home in Maine.

Adoption regulations and requirements vary by country. Guatemala, at the time, allowed parents to once the child had been formally relinquished. This means the child’s DNA test results identified her as the biological child of the birthmother who had signed the necessary court documents relinquishing her parental rights. The time came for us to visit Haydee when she was six months old. We spent a long weekend in Guatemala City. Our time with Haydee was amazing. We snuggled, bathed, fed and played with her. We told her stories of home and all about her big sister. We gave her a cloth book with family pictures. It was so hard to kiss her goodbye and hand her back to the orphanage director.

When Haydee was 8 months old, her visa still in limbo, we couldn’t be without her any longer. The final adoption decree had been signed six weeks prior, making her legally ours in Guatemala. At that time, typically,a visa would have been issued within 10 days of the adoption decree. The visa is a sticker for her passport, allowing her entry into the United States. Back in March, the US Government began talking about requiring all Americans to have passports to re-enter the US from places such as Canada and Mexico which created a rush in passport applications and caused significant delays in processing visa applications. The reason for the delay in Haydee’s homecoming was, at best, a Homeland Security issue.

Mothers Day came. Liefe and I went to wait for the visa with Haydee. We arrived in Guatemala City, unpacked a few things at Casa Grande, and took a taxi to Vida Nueva, the hogar (orphanage) where Haydee lived since she was a few days old. Haydee was in her crib, with the fabric book clipped to the side open to the page with my picture, just as Broo had left it 8 weeks ago when we last kissed her. She responded to my voice but her eyes lit up when she saw Liefe. She immediately bonded with her big sister. We were no longer a “waiting family” at this point. We were together, mother and daughters. And like the day I first held Liefe, this day, when I held Haydee, knowing we’d go home together, my fears lifted, and we’ve been kissing her goodnight, instead of goodbye, ever since.

The day that Haydee left Vida Nueva was a wonderful one. The sky was clear blue. That time of year, it rains almost every afternoon in Guatemala but not that day. The weather was warm, the sun shined brighter than any other day I remember. It felt like the world was on our side. My hesitations as a second time parent were gone. With Haydee in the maya wrap and Liefe holding my hand, it was hard to believe I doubted having enough love to go around.

The girls took to each other immediately. In the coming days, I’d learn how strong the bond was - initially Haydee refused to let me feed her, accepting the bottle only from Liefe. At the hotel, I spread a quilt over the marble floor and they’d play together: Liefe “reading” to Haydee who’d lie on her belly and look up at Liefe with those dark, beautiful eyes, I imagine trying to figure out how this had all happened. We spent the next three weeks at Casa Grande while Broo remained in Maine, keeping our businesses going and doing what he could from home to advocate for Haydee’s visa.

We explored as much of Guatemala City as we could. Our days began with breakfast in the courtyard. A fresh fruit plate worked worked well - no sharing was required as we each preferred different fruit. By the second day, the waiter noticed I needed ‘cafe con leche’ to start the day so he’d have it ready when I snuck down in my pajamas before the girls awoke. We’d stock the diaper bag with ‘agua pura’ (boiled water) and Haydee’s formula ‘nan uno’ and head out. Our first stop was the bank where we’d have to show the contents of the diaper bag to armed guards before we could exchange our travelers cheques for quetzales. Liefe’s favorite part getting a ‘dulce’ from the teller. Mine was, even thought I had to empty the diaper bag each time, they never once asked me to take Haydee out of the sling. With a few bucks in my pocket, we’d walk until our feet hurt, have lunch, and take a taxi back to Casa Grande where we’d nap while it rained. We got to know the walk from the hotel to the grocery store chain EconoSuper, visited a church, the children’s museum, the zoo, bookstores and bakeries. We marched in an anti-hunger parade and visited Safe Passage again. It was a pleasure to spend these days with my daughter in her birth country.

At Casa Grande we formed a community with others in similar situations. Children played together. Parents shared the best deals we’d found at markets for formula and baby bottles. We met informally at the hotel’s open courtyard cafe or on the metal swing set in the yard, shaded by fruit trees. In the evenings, we shared drinks and our stories. I learned there are many reasons why people adopt. And just as much thought goes into choosing the country of origin. Most of the parents we spoke with had chosen Guatemala for some combination of the following reasons. The travel requirement was flexible (some parents live in Guatemala while they are waiting for the adoption to go through, others come for a brief three day pick up). Most waiting children are placed in private foster homes, rather than orphanages. It’s fairly easy to travel to Guatemala, given its proximity to the US. Children whose adoptive parents visit before the visa have American citizenship upon entry into the United States. Guatemala was open to single and/or older parent adoptions. To me, Guatemala evokes images of a strong maternal culture, where mothers wear their babies and children grow up next to generations of strong, hard-working women. I witnessed that strength in the caregivers at Vida Nueva, particularly, Raquelinda, whom we lovingly refer to as Super Nanny, as she could literally do it all. During those three weeks, I found my strength from both ‘cafe con leche’ and in making time to honor Haydee’s birth mother. As adoptive mother, actress and author Jaime Lee Curtis explains, “We look at adoption as a very sacred exchange. It was not done lightly on either side. I would dedicate my life to this child.” And I have. That dedication ties us to Guatemala and to Haydee’s family of origin forever. We wouldn’t have it any other way.

buzzie bee is growing!

We're getting closer to offering diaper service to the southern area of mid-coast maine. Our start date is February 26th. On Monday February 25th 6-8pm, together with the Mid Coast Medical Group, we're offering a **FREE** Diapering 101 class. We'll demonstrate all sorts of cloth diapers, including the ones offered through Buzzie Bee Diapers, offer tips for home laundering as well details of the diaper service. We'll also provide participants with reasons for choosing cloth diapers. It's sure to be a fun, interactive event - complete with giveaways.

Diapering 101 location:
66 Baribeau Drive, Suite 1B
Brunswick, Maine 04011
(207)729-4392